A Definitive Guide to Living

Choose pretension! Choose taking the escalator! Choose youtube as the preferred entertainment choice for 4 hours daily! Choose quantifying your days by how productive you have been! Choose a life of optimum efficiency and maximum indolence! Choose misogyny, choose xenophobia, choose intolerance! Choose expensive, artificially-sweetened coffee roasted from coffee beans processed in third world sweatshops!

Welcome to life and living! Today, you are the free-willed, mightily-informed and wholly-autonomous 21st century consumer! And today, you, as the uniquely individualistic and enlightened individual, are privy to an exclusive access to a series of practical self-help guides proudly produced by Garbiage Publications Incorporated! These guides form the nexus of Garbiage’s Definitive Guide to Living and you are the center of it all – the plenipotentiary of self-agency!

Whether it is a racially-charge riot or a horrifically misguided Marxist revolution, whether its morally questionable bestiality or purely utilitarian fornication and philandering, you now have the authoritative means to do it! Come indulge in the extremes of debauchery and moral vacancy and celebrate the debased depths of the human condition!

Get your series today for only $9.99 (inclusive of GST)! All proceeds will be channeled to your local extremist organisation/ultra-nationalist lobby group!

(Let’s just say I’ve been really bored these days and I’ve had little other avenue to vent my ennui other than through some hobby graphic design inspired by my increasing ethically-challenged inhumanity. All images are copyrighted.)

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